Prospective Nanny FAQ

A. Right now there are no official requirements for working as a nanny. There are several private nanny schools and even more community colleges offering nanny training but there are no across the board standards regulating the curriculum they offer or the criteria that graduates must meet.

We recommend that every nanny...

* be certified in CPR and First Aid

* be able to plan a well-rounded, fun day for a child

* be able to provide a warm, loving, affectionate environment

* enjoy working in an in-home setting

* enjoy the company of children

* enjoy participating with and engaging children in educational, creative, social and physical activities

* have a basic understanding of child development and child related safety issues and be able to apply that knowledge to everyday situations

* have a positive and affirming discipline philosophy and communication style

* have a good sense of humor

* have a healthy dose of common sense

* have solid judgment

* have an abundance of patience

This list is by no means exhaustive. There are a multitude of abilities, skills, and personality traits that a quality nanny should possess. However, if the list above describes you, it is a safe bet that you will be successful in a nanny position.

Q. As a nanny, will I work regular hours or whenever the family wants me to?

A. The overwhelming number of nannies work a set schedule…usually Monday through Friday, starting between 7:00 – 8:00 AM and ending between 6:00 – 7:30 PM. So while you’ll have set hours, your day will be longer than if you worked in a daycare or preschool setting.

Q. I’ve only worked in a daycare setting. What is a typical nanny’s day like?

A. The nanny’s day depends upon the family’s and the nanny’s personal philosophy and preferences. Some nannies enjoy creating a preschool-like environment within the home: having scheduled time for arts and crafts, outdoor play, reading, etc. They often incorporate tools commonly found in educational facilities (i.e. sand / rice tables, felt boards, manipulative sets) into the play area. They plan activities that are fun yet have a well defined educational component. On the other hand, some nannies enjoy a completely unstructured day. They do whatever strikes them: spend the afternoon at the park, go to story time at the local bookstore, relax and watch a video, bake cookies. You should think about what type of environment you’d enjoy the most and look for a family that supports your ideas.

Although there is no truly typical day because every family is different, below is an outline of a “close to typical” day.

7:30 Nanny takes over for Dad. The kids, Ben, 4 ½, and Sarah, 11 months, are eating breakfast. Nanny makes her own breakfast, joins the kids at the table.

7:50 Breakfast is done. Nanny gets Sarah dressed, helps Ben get dressed.

8:10 Everyone goes to play room. Nanny helps Ben build a Lego castle while she keeps a close eye on Sarah who is exploring a new toy.

9:00 Sarah goes down for her morning nap. Nanny clears the kitchen table and gets the play dough out for Ben. While he makes “pizza”, Nanny cleans up from breakfast and starts a pasta salad for this afternoon’s playgroup.

9:20 Ben is bored.. Nanny helps him clean up the play dough. Ben goes into the playroom to play with his train table. Nanny runs downstairs to throw a load of laundry in. She pulls the clothes from the dryer out and brings them upstairs. She finishes the pasta salad.

10:00 Sarah wakes up. Nanny changes her and brings her downstairs. Everyone heads outside for a walk through the nature center down the street. Ben collects fall leaves along with a variety of sticks and pebbles. They save the collection to make a collage tomorrow. Sarah rides in the stroller, babbling throughout the walk. They have a snack and some juice then head to the pond to feed the ducks.

11:15 Everyone comes inside. The nanny folds the laundry and packs the diaper bag while Ben and Sarah play. Nanny put Sarah in her saucer while she runs downstairs to move the laundry from washer to dryer and puts in a second load.

11:45 Nanny grabs the pasta salad (her contribution to the adult lunch), loads the kids into the van and heads to a friend’s house for playgroup.

12:15 The host is ready with a kid-friendly menu. The nannies help their charges with lunch.

1:00 Lunch is over. The older kids move into the playroom. The nannies with smaller children move into the baby-friendly living room.

1:20 Sarah is ready for a nap. Nanny puts her down in the nursery upstairs. After patting her back and talking to her for a few minutes, Sarah settles down and goes to sleep.

1:30 The nannies sit down for an adult lunch and adult conversation. They stay aware of the action in the playroom but allow the kids to play independently.

2:45 Everyone heads outside for some jungle gym time. Nanny takes the baby monitor so she can hear any noise from Sarah.

3:20 Everyone heads back inside for a snack.

3:40 Sarah wakes up. Nanny changes her and brings her downstairs. She joins the older kids in a snack.

4:00 Nanny and kids head home. They stop by the grocery store and then the dry cleaners on the way.

4:50 Ben sits in the living room to watch a video. Sarah plays in the kitchen while Nanny makes dinner. Sarah sits in her saucer while Nanny runs downstairs to take the clothes out of the dryer and put the next load in. Nanny folds the clothes and with Sarah’s “help”, puts them away.

5:30 Nanny and the kids sit down to dinner.

6:10 Nanny cleans up the kids and then cleans up the kitchen.

6:20 Mom walks in to take over. Nanny fills her in on their day.

6:30 Nanny is off for the night.

Q. Will I have to wear a uniform?

A. The image of the “domestic nanny” (think woman in uniform, hose, black shoes walking down a Dynasty-like staircase holding the hand of child) is very popular with the media but very far from the real world. The typical nanny wears clothes that are presentable yet comfortable and built for caring for young children. Jeans / khakis / knit pants paired with a t-shirt / polo shirt / button down camp shirt are the common style. There are a few families that require all staff (i.e. nannies, housekeepers, drivers) to wear a uniform; normally a pair of khakis with a blue or green polo shirt embossed with the estate’s name. However, it is very unlikely you will encounter this situation since most of those families are looking for experienced / executive nannies.

Q. Will taxes by taken out of my paycheck?

A. You are legally required to pay Social Security, federal, state and local taxes on your wages. There are also other taxes that your employer is legally required to pay. Generally, the family will withhold (take out) these taxes from your paycheck.

There are families that don’t withhold or pay the required taxes. They pay their nanny “under the table”. Before going to work for a family that doesn’t pay taxes, consider all the implications. Yes, you will clear more money. But you will not be making any contributions to your Social Security retirement account. If fired, you will not be able to collect unemployment. If hurt on the job, you will not be able to collect workers' compensation. You will not be able to list your income on credit or lease applications. And if you or your employers are audited, you will be responsible for all back taxes plus penalties and interest. Ultimately, this is a personal decision but make sure you consider the pros and cons carefully before making it.

Q. I’ve heard from some agencies that if I take a job in a different city, I have to buy the plane ticket needed to get there. Is that typical?

A. With some agencies, it is typical. The idea behind the policy is that if a nanny gets to her new job and then decides to leave, the family won’t be out the price of the airfare. However, we don’t support that policy and tell the families we speak with that they, the employer, should be responsible for the cost. If the nanny is willing to relocate to a new city and move in with a family she’s only recently met, the family should be willing to pick up the airfare.

Q. Do I have to make a certain time commitment to the family that hires me?

A. Unless it is a summer or temp position, all families will require a one year commitment. If the relationship is successful, you can expect the family to ask you to stay longer unless you clearly state in the interview that you will only work for one year. If you’re considering working for more than one year, state a range (i.e. 1 to 3 years) rather than a specific length of time during the interview. Some families ask for a 2 - 5 year commitment. In real life terms, they are saying they would like to find a person that will be a nanny for at least 2 - 5 years and, if the nanny / family relationship works, will stay on with them for that length of time. No one, especially a first-time nanny, is expected to realistically commit for more than one year at a time.

Q. Do I have to sign a contract?

A. You and the family should complete a nanny / family work agreement that outlines all the details of the job. Although an agreement is not a legally binding contract, a well developed agreement states the expectations of both parties and supports the verbal contract between you and your employer. An agreement does not tie you to a bad situation. The family cannot force you to continue to work for them if you are unhappy.

Q. What if I don’t like the family once I start?

A. When you commit to a family, you should make every reasonable effort to make the situation work. If that isn’t possible, you are not legally obligated to stay in a bad job. To avoid this situation, it is important to take the time to get to know the family BEFORE you take the position.

Q. What if I decide a nanny job isn’t right for me?

A. Once you commit to a family, you are responsible for fulfilling that commitment unless the family reneges on their part of the agreement or provides a negative work environment. Just deciding you don’t want to be a nanny is not reason enough to leave a job. It is important to consider your decision very carefully BEFORE you commit to a position.

Q. What should I look for in a family?

A. You should start your job search by looking for families that meet your basic requirements…things that you have to have (i.e. location, salary, age of children). From there, you should narrow down your list to families that you will feel comfortable working for and, if you are a live-in, living with. During the interview process, you should find out…

What type of relationship does the family want with the nanny? Do they want her to be part of the family or just an employee?

What is their childcare philosophy? Are they strict or permissive? Do they have reasonable, consistent boundaries or do they let the kids rule? Do their parenting styles complement each other or do they frequently disagree on how to handle issues?

What kind of relationship do they have with their children? Are they affectionate or distant? Do they spend a lot of time with their children or do they have 24/7 care? Do they enjoy the time they spend with their children or does it seem more like a chore?

Is their environment one that you’ll be comfortable working in? Is their life hectic or laid back? Is their home formal or relaxed?

What is their communication style? Do they offer a lot of direction or do they want their nanny to work independently? Do they (or do they plan to) sit down for regular family meetings or only if there is a problem?

What is their overall attitude towards you? Do they treat you as a professional or a babysitter? Do they take the time to answer your questions and address any concerns you have or do they simply dismiss your questions or briefly touch on them without providing a clear answer?

After you have gotten to know a prospective family, compare who they are with who you are. The best nanny / family relationships are based on mutual respect and a common philosophy and approach. The number one thing to remember when deciding if a family is right for you is to TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS.

Q. How do I interview with a family that lives in a different city?

A. The first step in the interview process is a short “Do we want to pursue this?” phone conversation that lets you and the family get to know each other. If both parties are interested in moving forward, you’ll set a time for a more formal phone interview. (If time allows and the conversation is flowing, the first and second phone calls are often combined.) If the phone interview goes well, the family will arrange transportation for you to visit them for a personal interview. All expenses are paid for by the family.

Before traveling to a personal interview, make sure you conduct an in-depth phone interview to ensure the family is one that you are truly interested in. Every issue from the compensation package to childcare philosophy can be covered in the phone interview. The personal interview is the final stage in the process; it allows you to see the work (and living) environment, to confirm the information and the “vibes” you received during the phone interview and to observe the child and the interaction between child and parent.

Q. What is a nanny interview like?

A. The nanny / parent interview is generally informal. It really is a time for you to get to know each other. Interviews can last a few hours or a couple of days. It usually depends upon the family’s preferences and the nanny’s availability.

If your interview is scheduled for a couple of hours (generally in the morning or afternoon), you’ll usually spend time talking to the parents while the children are napping or involved in another activity. The parents will describe the details of the job, the personalities of the children, the activities they are involved in, a typical day, and the type of nanny they are looking for. You’ll also have the opportunity to ask any questions you have. After the conversation, you’ll generally have time to interact with the children. Parents often will ask a child to show you his room or a favorite toy to encourage interaction between you and the child.

If you are on an extended interview, it will start with a more structured interview (like the one described above) and then you will spend the rest of the time with the family involved in their regular activities. They may give you a tour of the area, take you to their favorite family restaurant for dinner or introduce you to one of their favorite family activities (i.e. spending time at the swim club, going to the park).

Q. What should I wear to an interview?

A. For a conversation based interview (usually one that will only last an hour or two), you should wear clothes that are a step or two up from what you would wear in your day to day role as a nanny. Anything that falls into the category of “casual Friday” works well. Because so many companies have embraced weeklong dress down policies, casual yet professional clothes are easy to find. Remember, this may be a conversation based interview but you will still be expected to interact with the child which could means sitting on the floor, walking through the backyard to the swing set, or even kicking a soccer ball around. Make sure you wear clothes that allow you to do those things comfortably.

For an activity based interview, you should wear whatever the day calls for. If you are going to the park on cool, fall day then a pair of jeans, a sweater and boots would be appropriate. If you are going on a picnic on a hot, sunny day then a pair of shorts, a t-shirt and sneakers would be appropriate. Use your best judgment. If you don’t know what the family is planning, simply ask. It shows that you are thinking ahead and want to be prepared. Always a good trait for a nanny.

Things to avoid..

* dirty, stained or wrinkled clothes

* clothes that are too tight or limit your range of motion

* clothes that make you feel and act stiff and uncomfortable

* too much of anything…perfume, jewelry, make-up

* ANYTHING revealing. It may be in style but it is not appropriate. Too much leg, cleavage or midriff can very well lose you the job.

* power dressing. Business suits and heels don’t make you look professional, just distant and untouchable. Not good nanny qualities.

Before you put something on, think about what you will look like bending over, stretching your arms above your head, and sitting cross-legged on the floor. At one time or another during the interview, the chances are very good that you’ll find yourself in one (if not all) of those positions.

Q. What questions should I ask during the interview?

A. Interviewing effectively is the most important thing you can do to ensure a successful match. We have developed a list of questions you can use to help you gather the information you need to make an informed decision. You can find this free guide in our Nanny Publications section.

Q. I’m nervous about moving to a place where I don’t know anyone. Is it hard to meet people?

A. Most jobs are in areas where there are many other nannies: a great starting place for building a new circle of friends. You can connect with other caregivers at the park, the Y, the library, and in many areas, through the local nanny support group. You can also meet other people in your area by getting involved with a local church community, taking an adult education class or joining a gym.

Almost all nannies become homesick at one time or another. It is part of the adjustment process. However, if you have serious and ongoing reservations about moving away from family and friends, you should consider taking a job close to home.

Q. I’ve never driven in a large city. Should I be worried?

A. Driving in a city or large suburban area is different than driving in a small town but most nannies adjust very quickly. If you find you are still nervous after a few weeks in your new area, you can enroll in a defensive driving class to boost your confidence and to sharpen your defensive driving skills.

Q. What kind of living space will I get as a live-in nanny?

A. Every nanny’s space is different. The most basic is a private bedroom with a bathroom next door or across the hall. The majority of families offer a private bedroom with a bathroom connected. Some also offer a sitting area, a kitchenette, a private entrance or other amenities. Your living space could be located with the rest of the family bedrooms, off a common area (i.e. kitchen, living room), on the 3^rd floor, in the basement or over the garage. Your space usually depends upon the layout of the house. There are some families that provide a completely separate apartment but those positions are highly sought after making the competition stiff.

Q. What do I need to bring with me for a live-in position?

A. Families provide basic furnishings (i.e. bed, dresser, night stand), bedding (i.e. sheet sets, comforter / blankets, pillows), and generally a TV, VCR and phone. If you have not seen your living space before you begin your job, ask your employers what they supply before you arrive. Although you only need to bring minimal personal items, you will be happier if you make your space your own so bring at least a few things that you love, things that will make you feel at home.

Q. It is weird thinking about moving in with a family I don’t know really know. How do other nannies handle it?

A. It is a very unique experience living with the family you’re working for. For some nannies, it is a natural transition. For others, it takes a bit more time and effort. You can make the transition easier by…

* setting professional and personal boundaries from the beginning

* making your space feel like home

* taking advantage of the unique things your new area has to offer

* developing an outside life

* connecting with other nannies

* keeping in touch with friends and family from home

Q. Can I have friends over in my off time?

A. Unless you are working for a family that has unusual privacy or security needs (i.e. a high profile family), having friends over should not be a problem. Some families are naturally social and their attitude is the more the merrier. Other families are more private yet understand that you have a life outside of your job and that you’re not only working in their home, you’re living there too. They trade off a bit of privacy for a quality live-in caregiver. NOTE – You should discuss all household policies in the interview process. Never assume anything.

Q. Will my friends from home be able to come out and visit?

A. Most employers make a genuine effort to make you feel at home including welcoming your friends and family for visits. In return, you should clear the dates with your employers in advance, make sure your guests follow any household rules (i.e. no smoking in the house, no eating in the living room), and pay for any related expenses such as extra groceries. NOTE – You should discuss all household policies in the interview process. Never assume anything.

Q. I’m interested in becoming a nanny. How do I get started?

A. You can find a nanny position in several different ways. Of course we suggest that you apply to our Nanny Recruitment Program. You can also work with individual agencies, register with other online sites and pursue leads found in local newspapers.